Mr Tid (Graham Chapman) begins the sketch but the Gumbys from the previous sketch can be heard loudly chanting /”The Architects Sketch/” to which he pours a bucket of water over them.

The sketch proper begins with Tid in an office with two city gents (Michael Palin and Terry Jones). On a table near the window stand two architectural models of tower blocks. Mr Tid informs the City gents that he has invited the architects responsible to explain the advantages of their respective designs.

First to arrive is Mr Wiggin (John Cleese), who proceeds to describe his design’s neo-Georgian architecture features and modern construction, and then explains that tenants entering the block will be carried on a conveyor belt towards a soundproofed section containing rotating knife. It turns out that Mr Wiggin mainly designs slaughterhouses and has misunderstood the owners’ attitude to their tenants. When Mr Wiggin fails to persuade them to accept his design (/”You wouldn’t regret this – think of the tourist trade!/”) he launches into a long, impassioned tirade against /”non-creative garbage/” and blackballing Freemasons. When they still reject his design, however, he immediately recants and begs – unsuccessfully – to be accepted as a Mason because /”Masonry opens doors/”.

Once Wiggin has been persuaded to leave, the second architect, Mr Leavey (Eric Idle), arrives. Mr Leavey proceeds to describe the strong construction and safety features of his design. His model promptly collapses and catches fire, accompanied by a large on-screen caption reading /”satire/”. The city gents assure Mr Leavey that provided the tenants are /”of light build and relatively sedentary/” there should be no need to make expensive changes to the design. Meanwhile, the model explodes.

The city gents exchange a Masonic handshake with Leavey. Wiggin reappears at the doorway to tell the audience /”It opens doors, I’m telling you/”.

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